voiceless we attempt to communicate otherwise, though no one listens, though stripped bare still no one cares

i've lost all words. it all comes up in vomit, all day long, sometimes just bile when i'm too afraid to eat. it comes up in blood, in tears disguised in the shower, in my chattering teeth. in my wrecked and sluggish body. 


there is not enough valium in the world for this. 


i am never coming back here again. i have two and a half more days with my family but it might as well be years. i can't get out. i'll never get out. 

i just have no words, i've been robbed and forced dumb, as ever, as ever, as my whole life, forever.